Watch the full-length tutorial here.
With its plethora of knots and patterns, shibari is a hands-on skill. You can start by looking for beginner classes in your area. Usually, they are conducted by rope pros and take place with the participants wearing clothes, so there’s no nudity involved. You can join alone, with a partner, or even book a private lesson. Live classes are tricky in times of social distancing, but there are also many online resources. Begin by checking out the CHEEX tutorial, where you can learn a few easy but effective ties.
Shibari (Japanese for “tying/binding”), or kinbaku (“tight binding”), is a centuries-old Japanese art of erotic rope tying that is said to have developed from an even older method of immobilising war prisoners. Now a consensual practice enjoyed by many all around the world, it falls into the bondage (B) category of BDSM, as it involves restraint, but it differs greatly from Western-style bondage. Whereas the former serves mainly to restrain a person quickly and practically, shibari is meant to convey emotions in an aesthetic way. It is as much of an art form as it is a kinky practice. The works of the influential Japanese photographer Nobuyoshi Araki can give a good insight into the aesthetics of shibari; his most renowned images, which stirred controversy, feature women in the nude, intricately tied in an artful way.
Like many traditional Japanese arts, such as origami or bonsai, shibari is all about patience and attention to detail. The rigger, the person tying the rope, can spend hours intricately restraining the rope bunny. Depending on the rigger’s skill and vision, the rope ties can be used to create patterns and harnesses that underline the shape of the body, to fix the rope bunny in a specific pose, or even to support their weight fully so that they can be suspended in the air.
While shibari is undeniably aesthetic, it also involves power exchange. The rope bunny consensually submits to the rigger’s will, which may include exposure to various sensations through toys, implements and body parts. Some rope bunnies report experiencing a pleasant endorphin rush, either during the restraint or shortly after being released.
So you want to be a rigger/rope bunny?
Step One: Know The Ropes (Literally)
You will most likely need more rope than you think. In shibari, several six- to eight-metre-long pieces are typically used. This length provides ample working space while avoiding excess that could be in the way. For a full body bondage on an average-sized person, you’ll require five to ten lengths of rope. Opt for natural-fibre ropes, such as hemp or jute, for their rough texture with a bit of grip on the skin and a traditional look. Nowadays, there is a wide selection of both natural and synthetic ropes available, both online and in brick-and-mortar shops; you can even check your local DIY market for some budget options! Each type of rope has slightly different qualities, so it’s a good idea to compare how it looks and feels in person, always considering the intended purpose. For instance, not all ropes are equally suitable for suspension. If you’re not sure, consult your local rope community. Also, consider that rope transforms with use; stiff natural fibres will soften with every use, which can be further helped by applying oil or wax.
Step Two: Learn the Ropes (With Others or Alone)
Whether online or offline, seeing the knots being tied in motion, with some spatial depth, while following directions can help understand the process. This visual guidance allows you to grasp which end of the rope should be placed where offering more insight than static images of the final result. By the way, it is possible to be both a rigger and a rope bunny at the same time—self-bondage is a thing! Putting some rope on yourself in an elaborate way can be either a grounding sensual practice, foreplay to a self-love session or a touch of visual variety for taking some nudes, or, if you wish, all the above.
Step Three: Play Safe
Shibari patterns may seem quite delicate, but, as with any practice involving restraint, safety precautions are essential. As a rigger, you absolutely must know what you’re doing. If you’re not sure, you don’t know the risks involved. And if the risks aren’t known to both parties, consent is not possible.
As a bunny, you can check out “The Rope Bottom Guide” by Clover of Studio Kokoro; it’s a great resource for those starting out on their rope journey. The more complicated knots can take a while to master, so for the sake of both your rope bunny and your ceiling, don’t dive head-first into suspension bondage.
As with any BDSM practice that you are trying out with a partner, communication is key. A safeword system ensures that the person being tied up can be released or at least have their restraints loosened whenever the need arises. It’s also the rigger’s responsibility to regularly check in on the restrained person to see if the rope isn’t too tight in any spot, obstructing the blood flow. Any uncomfortable numbness or discolouration of body parts means it’s time for release… Now! For that reason, it’s best to keep a pair of medical shears (like the ones you would find in a first aid box) nearby in case of an emergency. Also, be mindful that dragging rope across the skin can cause friction burn. This isn’t really dangerous, but can still be quite painful (unless pain is your thing, then more power to you, but proceed with caution anyway!)
