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How To: Scissoring

By CHEEX
June 1, 2023

Myth or reality? Probably the most often lesbian sex position depicted in porn, it is neither the only position for people with vulvas, nor inevitable. So who is it for? And how to do it?

When thinking about lesbian sex, scissoring – or the rubbing of two clitoris against one another – is often the first position that comes to mind. Predominantly depicted in lesbian porn, when it comes to ‘real sex’ it has often been ascribed to myth, including by some lesbian themselves. While some may enjoy it, it is not for everyone.

The Position

To perform Scissoring as most know it, both partners must be lying on their side and interlace their legs as to rub their clitoris against each other’s. You may want to hold on to one of your partner’s legs to help you grind with your hips and find a rhythm. Keep your lube on hand – the wetter the better: it will make sliding against each other even smoother, and most probably more enjoyable. This position can be very sexy and intimate as you can gaze at each other’s bodies or hold eye contact.

Spice it Up!

For even more stimulation, you may also use a flat vibrator to place between each other’s clitoris. You also could add some consensual penetration, either vaginal or anal.

Is Scissoring for Me?

If Scissoring is not only a “porn stunt” – as many seem to believe – it is also far from being every vulva-owners go-to. Indeed, this position can be more or less pleasurable depending on your anatomy. If your clitoris tends to be lower, it might be more difficult to find a friction point in a basic scissoring position. Conversely, a higher clitoris may make it easier and more pleasurable.

Even with a favourable anatomy, this position still requires some flexibility and stamina. One or both partners must grind with their hips while holding themself(-elves) halfway up – but do not make it your be-all and end-all: scissoring is not the only sex position for people with vulvas, and it can be performed at any time during sex – or not at all.

While scissoring is a thing, it is not for everybody. Do not feel pressured to get into this position if you are engaging in sex with a fellow vulva-owner, especially not for the first time. Only when you have gotten comfortable with each other, would we recommend trying it. Like many more technical sex positions, it can get messy: awkward to get into or find your rhythm and prone to funny-sounding (but totally normal) noises.

Friction Fun

If the basic scissoring position sounds somewhat unrealistic for you to achieve, you are not alone! Luckily, it is easily adaptable: scissoring is really all about friction – and it does not necessarily have to be clitoris to clitoris. You can rub your clitoris against any other body part: thigh, chest, arm… You also do not have to mirror each other. One partner can be more passive, while the other takes on a more active role. You can be both lying on your side, sitting in lotus, kneeling, facing each other, or one straddling the other while they lie on either their back or their stomach… the possibilities are endless. Again, there can never be too much lube – especially when grinding against a dry area.

Stay Protected

With vulva-to-vulva contact, there will inevitably be bodily fluid exchange… and with it comes risks of STIs transmission. To remain safe, place a dental dam between each other’s genitalia.