How to be Cybersexy: 8 Tips for Digital Sex

The contact restrictions imposed due to COVID-19 aren’t exactly fun, especially for those of us who are single! This led us to ponder how we can still meet new people without risking the spread of the virus.

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The solution: digital dating and digital intimacy. Platforms such as Tinder seem to be making a big comeback. I’m back in the game myself and have discovered that it’s extremely busy!With most of us spending more time on our cell phones than ever before, “real life” can no longer distract us from connection. Plus, the desire for intimacy has surged due to social isolation, making for the ideal conditions for getting to know someone.Half-serious and half-ironic, I added “cybersex only” to my Tinder bio. Due to the messages that entered my inbox, I quickly realized that a digitally mediated sex practice is still uncharted territory for many. So, if you don’t want to put yourself at risk of getting infected, and chatting or having a distanced walk won’t do, here are:

8 Sex Tips with no Risk of Infection!

#1 Consent is Fundamental

First and foremost, it must be crystal clear that both parties involved are interested in an online sexual encounter. Unsolicited explicit images are as out of place here as they would be in person. You can either directly ask if the other person is open to receiving explicit content or gauge if the conversation naturally evolves into a sexting vibe. Consent and an understanding of the other person’s boundaries are particularly crucial for online interactions, as some cues from non-verbal communication are more challenging to pick up on.

#2 Which Kind of Cyber Sex Suits Me?

There are numerous ways to enjoy digital sexy time, whether through sexting, Skype sex or erotic phone conversations. The best way to discover your preferences is to experiment. Virtual sex can involve simultaneous masturbation or creating a shared fantasy—imagining what you would do together if you were physically present. Crafting a joint script for your encounter allows anticipation to build. There are (almost) no limits to your imagination.

However, pay close attention to your communication with the other person; respect signals such as specific messages left unanswered and establish boundaries accordingly. Another very important thing to remember is that writing about something doesn’t imply a real-life enactment; consent must be reaffirmed consistently.

#3 Send Nudes (Safely)

Let’s delve into the realm of data security for a moment. Especially when sharing your intimate visuals with a person you don’t know very well, safety is the utmost priority. Anonymity is key—conceal your face, tattoos, birthmarks or any distinctive features that might reveal your identity. Take care to ensure no identifiable objects from your surroundings, such as furniture or family photos, appear in the pictures. Lastly, be vigilant about excluding any important documents, such as letters, bank statements or credit cards, that someone may just be able to zoom in on.

Also, there are some apps which are just safer to use. Opt for apps such as Signal and Telegram over WhatsApp, Instagram, Snapchat or Facebook Messenger. Signal, Telegram, and the Wire app feature end-to-end encryption, screenshot-blocking, secret chats, a self-destruct timer for messages, and the option to hide your phone number—providing an added layer of protection for your digital interactions.

#4 From Texting to Sexting

An easy way to steer the conversation in the right direction is a straightforward “What are you doing?” coupled with a personal description of what you’re doing at that moment. When the vibe is right and the mood is set, the rest just happens naturally. If you prefer a more direct approach, describe what you would want to happen, such as “I would really like to touch you now…”

#5 How to Keep the Conversation Going

Many of you may be wondering how to respond, especially if you’re unsure of what to say or write. Here are a few suggestions to stay in the flow:

  1. Ask questions: “How does this feel to you?” or “What would you like to do to me right now?”
  2. Make suggestions: “I would like XY now…” or “Then we could do XY.”
  3. Describe what is happening: “It feels so good!” or “I am so wet/hard”.
  4. Watch a porno together: One person chooses the film and sends the link to the other.
  5. Read erotic texts to each other.
  6. If you don’t like something, say it openly and honestly: “I don’t think I like it that much, but how about XY?”

#6 Hotline Bling

Phone sex may sound kind of ’90s, but it’s still cutting edge. If you’ve already checked out CHEEX’s audio section, you already know how stimulating sounds can be. Telling someone what you’d like to do together via call or voice message is an incredibly sensual experience and can feel more natural than texting or Skype sex. Our imaginations can be even more vivid without visual stimuli, which can lead to whole new levels of arousal. Try it out! Especially if you know each other a little, a sexy surprise call during (home) office hours or an isolation walk can be super exciting.

#7 Turn Yourself On First!

It’s helpful to start by taking a few nudes just for yourself, preferably in front of a mirror and with good lighting. Put on something that makes you feel sexy, maybe pour yourself a glass of wine and show yourself your most sensual side. You will quickly find out how you prefer to stage yourself for nudes, and you can share your newfound knowledge with others. The whole thing can be done with photos, videos, or even GIFs. Get creative!

Even if a second person is involved, take your time with the nudes! Finding the right angle takes time and practice. You should love the result as much as the recipient. Besides, waiting can be sexy!

Another thing: Nudes don’t necessarily have to be naked. By cropping photos, you can stage certain bits of your body while the rest can be left to the imagination and guessed. Rest assured, more pics will be requested.

#8 Skypedate Gone Hot

If you don’t have a problem explicitly lounging around in front of the webcam, you will have a lot of fun here. Sex via Skype, Facetime, Google Hangout, etc., can be great, especially for visual people who feel comfortable in front of the camera. However, it is more difficult to remain anonymous or prevent secretly filming the screen in this context. So it’s best to go for it only when you trust the other person. An innocent Skype date can be redirected in the right direction by giving simple hints or an unexpected nipple flash. As with taking pictures, good lighting is recommended—atmospheric but bright enough to guarantee great sights.

A tip for those who do not feel that comfortable in front of the camera: looking into each other’s eyes through the webcam while masturbating can make you reach whole new levels of intimacy.

All tips can, of course, be used when social distancing is over—in long-distance relationships, for example—and are guaranteed to enrich your sex life.

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