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Mirror Masturbation

To reveal and observe your genitalia in a mirror can feel overwhelming, but using a mirror can help us form a deeper relationship with our genitals while moving our sexual life force energy through our body.

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Mirror Work combines affirmations and the use of a mirror. It is essential to note the term ‘work’ as it can take a lot to sit in front of the mirror, especially when saying affirmations aloud that go against what you may have been conditioned to believe and feel about yourself. There is no escape when you sit with your reflection.

Affirmations are messages you are sending to your subconscious.

Every day, your subconscious feeds messages to your conscious without you even realising it. We are impacted by our subconscious 95% of the time (1). For example, if you were repeatedly told that you were undeserving of love as a child, your subconscious will keep feeding that thought to your adult-conscious mind. By consciously starting to tell yourself, ‘I deserve love,’ you can change that narrative. It sounds simple, and that is because it is. You just need to be consistent. Affirmations allow you to plant seeds of positivity into your mind so you can grow them. If you say these positive affirmations aloud to yourself in the mirror, the mirror will reflect your feelings. You will be able to observe your body and how it reacts; you will be right there, looking yourself in the eye, telling yourself what you need to hear.

Mirror Masturbation Practice: A Ceremony

We want to begin and end this mirror masturbation practice in a ceremony. To start with, you will need to find yourself a space that feels safe and where you will not be disturbed. Make that space feel luxurious by bringing in candles, flowers, or any items you love into the room.

In the tantric world, genitals were celebrated with gifts during ceremonies. You can honour your genitals by buying them a gift or finding an object on the beach that represents your genitals, for example. When you find a gift, acknowledge it is for your sacred genitalia space.

The ceremony can start when you have put your favourite sensual playlist on, lit the candles, brought your gift, and are sitting in front of a mirror.
Begin to take off your clothes in front of the mirror. As you do so, repeat affirmations out loud to yourself. Focus on areas of the body that you love. If you love your shoulders, be with them: take time to look at each one of them, touch them, and thank them both for allowing you to hug your loved ones, move your arms and anything else you would like to thank them for. How beautiful to thank body parts for things we might take for granted! Sit for a short moment with all your body parts: you can either start with the areas you love the most, working your way to those needing more acknowledgement, or start from the feet up. Thank them, through touch and awareness, for everything that they do.

Here are some examples of affirmations:
  • I am here (bringing in presence and safety)
  • I love you
  • I love my body (or insert a body part name instead, such as shoulder)
  • I trust in the wisdom of my body
  • I am loved and nurtured
  • The earth below holds me
As you remove your clothes and say your affirmations, ensure you continue touching yourself. This could look like stroking, holding, circling, or massage touch to the muscles. Feel your kundalini sexual life force energy moving and swirling around the body from the base of the spine upward.I would also invite you to take photos of the body parts you love in the mirror. Taking creative, fun images with the mirror builds on the relationship you are creating with your body and is especially useful if you would like to look back on your experience. You could take inspiration from fun selfie 35mm Instagram accounts that take photos of just their hands, legs or half of their body in a range of mirrors.When you feel ready, part your thighs and take the time to observe your genitalia in the mirror. Breathe deeply into this space and acknowledge the beautiful expanse of space between the thighs. Feel the energy moving from your genitalia upwards. Observe your body’s reaction(s) and any emotions that may arise. Stay with them. Remember the gift you brought into the ceremony and your positive affirmations.Touch your thighs and any other place on the body that needs more love while breathing and moving the energy. You may now want to touch your genitals. Feel free to use any toy, lubricant or whatever else you would like to be with your genitals and the mirror.Continue to explore and use the mirror until you feel you have reached closure on the ceremony.Close the space you have created by blowing out the candles. Think of something that you do want to let go of (it could be a negative feeling, emotion or unwanted memory), and as you blow out the candle, imagine it moving from your mind and into the universe to be moved through and out of the body..Thank yourself and your body for this time spent together. Say one last affirmation for your body and hug yourself.
Here is a quick summary of how to masturbate with a mirror:
  • Find yourself in a ceremony with a mirror, candles and a gift for your genitals
  • Slowly remove your clothes, while touching every area of your body with affirmations
  • Open your thighs and start to be with your genitals through mirror gazing and touch
  • Continue to explore the body for as long as you need
  • Close the ceremony by thanking your body, blowing out the candle and bringing in a closing embrace for everything that arose during the session

Sources:

(1) Young, Emma. “Lifting the Lid on the Unconscious,” newscientist.com, 25 July 2018. https://www.newscientist.com/article/mg23931880-400-lifting-the-lid-on-the-unconscious/

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