You may see this experience as something that can only be pleasurable for the man opposite you, I think you’re wrong: it can feel so great to be the one taking the reins, and can really be amazing just for you too.
In my opinion and experience, I usually used to save my blowjobs for some men I deemed special or worthy. But I realized that I was therefore going against myself and making it all about him, what a waste! Think of all of those moments I could have not only given pleasure but experienced it myself on another level.
It’s something different when you’re the one performing.
Nothing in sex should be just about the other person because that implies that it doesn’t push your buttons in any way, and even the sheer glee you get by giving someone else absolute pleasure is, and should be a total turn on – it’s sexy.
Always Do What Feels Right
First of all let me be very clear about something, nothing you do should be forced and you should never let any outside factors or guilt make you do something that you don’t want to do.
If your partner is pressuring you into something, then he might not be the one you want to experience with. It has to come from you, and your own desires and curiosity.
This is a moment in which you are in total control, you are the goddess and the one deciding what goes on: learn to love that feeling because it may not happen that often.
If you are one of the many who isn’t a fan of the mythical bj, then let this be the turn on. You are literally holding him by the balls during this moment, don’t let it go to your head but go for it, give him head!
So, let’s now delve a little deeper into the practical matters of the so-called job:
How To Perform a Blowjob
One of the myths of the blow job is that you have to deep throat in order for it to be good, that’s untrue! From the moment you’re on your knees, down on him in the bed or in any other of the positions you may practice; trust me, he’s loving it regardless. You’ve got the skillz, relax, go for it, and love it!! Let it empower you and let go of any a priori you may have about this practice, just be in the now and let yourself love it and he will too. If you believe you’re sexy, then he’ll be right there with you.
Watch “Close to the Edge“
Sure, there are a few things to avoid, the classic big no-no would be the teeth. Just be careful you aren’t accidentally rubbing against your teeth, remember how sensitive that part of his body is, and that this isn’t the moment to be getting bitey.
Do not forgot to use your hands
You can mimic the gesture you’re performing with your mouth at the same time, or you can switch from your hands while you maybe lower yourself and take on his balls. Very gently licking, caressing or sucking on them could greatly improve the sensation and make it all the more intense.
Even if there’s a part of you that’s doing it for him, don’t let him feel that – enthusiasm is a turn on! Maybe you just need to get used to it to be able to enjoy it yourself, but in all cases, making him feel it’s also satisfying you will turn him on and eventually make you be turned on too. Nobody wants to feel a part of them is unappetizing or disgusting, so avoid any gag like reflexes too. If you want to try and deep throat, it can be great, but little by little. You must test is out first of all, and then see if you’re able to enjoy it.
Don’t force it – do not force anything!
Just because you’re the one going down on him and even though you may enjoy it, obviously he will be more; this isn’t the time to utterly forget about yourself.
© Nina Sever
He might be getting so turned on that he’ll want to touch you at the same time too. Some positions may make this a little odd and unpractical but be open to both experiencing pleasure at the same time
You can always let a blowjob become a 69
and then you really will be able to both experience the maximum of oral sex pleasures together as one. Now the final little question many of us ask ourselves is:
Should I swallow or not? How to end a blowjob?
Emphasis here on the mis-use of the verb should.
You shouldn’t do anything, whatever you feel comfortable with. But again, swallowing can feel great for you, don’t just assume that you are submitting to him by doing this. He’ll love it, but you might too! It can actually be sexy just for you too.
So although bjs are a 101 of foreplay and are a thing everyone seems to do, they are a subject of much controversy.
So keep in mind, it’s all about the people involved, not just one.
And not to let pressure, fears or any societal values you may feel imposed on you make you shy away from something that can bring both parties immense pleasure!
